Thursday, April 10, 2008

What Not To Say

I promise, this will be the last post that I refer to being ill for awhile...but I've been compiling these little gems in the part of my brain that will self distruct and explode my blood and guts all over everyone around me at the most inopportune moment. I only wish I could be alive to see their reaction.

As things have been steadily going south with annoying things like breathing, I got the following comment from a coworker who had not been in my vacinity ten minutes previous when I was coughing so hard I almost puked on my keyboard: "Hey, you're not coughing today. I guess that means you must be feeling better."

Comment from a person I only fleetingly know and am not a terribly big fan of upon finding out that I am too sick to take the trip to Washington DC: "Oh how sad...do you want a hug?"

Comment from my husband upon finding out that I am operating on 40% lung function:"Maybe you just need to get into an aerobic exercise program."

Comment from my husband continuously for the last eleven months as I've gone through joint swelling, joint pain, a brutal cough, coughing up blood for 11 months, and now, the inability to breathe: "I think you're just allergic to the dog."

Comment after going home an hour early from a coworker: "Are you all better now?"

Comment from a total stranger upon seeing that I opted to take the elevator up floor when he opted to take the stairs."Wow, some people really aren't in to exerting themselves at all."

I don't know what I have but I hope to find out in the next month. If it's something horrible and deadly, I need to compile some comments for these assholes that will totally stop them in their tracks.

Suggestions?

1 comment:

Rebecca Hartong said...

I think a 2-second cold glare followed by a "Fuck you" is very effective.

But that's just me.

And it probably wouldn't work well at your place of employment. Assuming you want to keep that job...

It's good to hear you've finally found a doctor who's making serious efforts to diagnose you, though. I'm optimistic they'll figure it out quickly and it will be something that's relatively easy to fix and, a year from now, you'll look back on this time and say, "Wow -- that really sucked. I feel SO much better now!"

:-)