Friday, May 22, 2009

Verdict - Or Should I Say "Decision"

Guilty.

Sentencing on June 26th. Maximum penalty, 90 months in prison.

I then returned to a settlement offer in my mailbox from his divorce attorney. He stated that "his client was being more than generous" in his offer not to try to wring money out of me.

We will hopefully just drop it all and walk away.

He did state that he wanted the return of some of his personal possessions.

Funnily enough, if he would read the Order For Protection, he would see that all he has to do is arrange a time and bring a uniformed police officer with him.

I will not equivocate on this point. I'll be damned if I will haul a single molecule of his shit anywhere on this planet. I carry his shit in my heart 24/7. He can kiss my ass if he wants it any other way.

After all, I can wait until June 26th, just like he can. Suddenly, I am in absolutely no hurry to do a damn thing.

5 comments:

Rebecca Hartong said...

I'm confused. (What else is new?) Was there a trial? Or was this one of those things where there's no jury -- where the judge alone decides (because there's a child involved)?

At any rate, the guilty finding is excellent. At least THIS part is behind you. May the sentencing phase be as just.

Wulfgar said...

Hi Debbie,

I can't say I'm happy for you, so I'll say I'm glad he was found guilty. It's officially part of the court record now, so his stench can be aired in the light. It also gives you vindication.

Everything will get better from here.

You're in my thoughts.

Debbie said...

Perhaps it was misleading to say "verdict".

He decided to plead guilty.

Today was his choice to plead innocent or guilty. If he would have plead innocent, there would have been a trial because I told the Prosecuting Attorney that I was not willing to plea bargain.

This has been the underlying awful decision I made awhile ago. That by not agreeing to a plea bargain, I might push this to a trial. I was told by two different folks in the profession of law that "no one pleads guilty when they're facing prison".

I was also told by his sister that he wasn't going to push this to a trial.

Thanks to that little tidbit of information, I decided to take an absolutely horrifying gamble that his lawyer wouldn't make him change his mind.

By us not offering a plea bargain, he blinked first.

It was a decision that I made with my daughter and I explained how awful going to a trial would be. She knew that she would have to listen to them try to make her sound like a liar or a present day slut or a million other things that would disparage her or myself.

But we didn't blink.

Now, we work on our victim impact statements and hope that the judge doesn't fall for his bullshit "I'm the victim" sob story.

I must admit, I fell apart in the hallway of the courthouse today. I had three wonderful friends and the county attorney to talk me down. I felt like his lawyer would make him out to be all squeaky clean and cured from his therapy. I was assured that this would not be the case.

I also had to listen to an excruciating list of charges being read out and he had to respond to each one of them "guilty". By the end of the list, I couldn't even breathe.

I've lost two parents and a brother in my life. I've tried to end it all in regards to my own childhood abuse twice.

Today was the most devastating, horrible, and sad day in my existence.

My daughter is the most amazing, strong, beautiful, and incredible human being I will ever know.

I have never been more proud of anyone in this world.

Anonymous said...

I am so happy that he plead guilty. He knew he was guilty. I am also so proud of your daughter. She could not have gotten through all of this without your support. There are absolutely better days ahead for you and your kids.

Good luck at the sale on Saturday. And have fun at the movie with "your guy."

Pam

pmunson said...

Thank GOD!! I've been praying that the bastard gets what he deserves. Karma…isn’t it beautiful?

Now on to sentencing…DIVORCE…and freedom.