Monday, August 31, 2009

Dewey, Cheatem, and Howe

First of all, Ms. H. is doing quite well in her far, far away.

She entered an art contest at an anime convention and won first place.

She is in love with bullfighting. If you ever have a bull that is really pissing you off, I can hook you up.

Got a china shop? You know who to call.

I realized something as I got back. Something that I knew was there but I didn't know how much it was dragging me down.

The oppressiveness of this house and this existence here in this exact space.

I actually had a couple days straight when I didn't think about the past nine months. I actually felt like a normal, whole human being.

And then I got back to a mailbox with correspondence from my new best friends at the Department of Corrections. Apparently, since I asked for the info, I will be told whenever STBX gets out, changes his address, or dies for the ten years of his parole. I just need to keep them updated as to our whereabouts.

But, the one thing that just got me a tad annoyed was that they referred to him as Tracy Christopher Shaddox instead of Tracy Curtis Shaddox. Yes, they got his OID number correct and yes, that number is connected up to his correct information but it's just annoying. Everyone is human and everyone makes mistakes but if you can't get the little shit right, how can I assume you can handle the big stuff?

On other news fronts, I've decided that I'm going to create an interpretive dance routine to take to my lawyers office. Since phone calls and hen pecking don't seem to get me anywhere, I'm going to dress in a body suit covered in post it notes. Every single post it note will have a goal written on it. A goal that is currently being held up by the fact that I am still married.

See, she can tell me all she wants that "Mentally, you know you're divorced" and "You have to realize that this will be with you your entire life" but when it comes to refinancing my house, I need to dump the dead weight. (Oh, that's right. I'll be informed if he dies...I guess I need to dump the useless weight...)

And funnily enough, it's hard to get your case back on the court calendar when the COURT HASN'T HEARD FROM YOUR LAWYER TO GET THE COURT CASE BACK ON THE CALENDAR.

Yes. These things take time.

And they take more time when clients are soothed over with platitudes before they go on vacation only to come back from said vacation and learn that a request for another court date has yet to be made.

Maybe some day stalling lawyers will have the experience of taking a loved one into the emergency room when they have collapsed. The nurses will assure them that CPR is being given and all they need to do is sit down in the waiting room and shut up because THESE THINGS TAKE TIME.

And after a significant amount of time has passed, they will wander into the exam room only to find their loved one cold and lifeless and the doctors sitting around the break room playing cards.

Perhaps the doctor will look up at this point and an expression of dawning recognition will come across his face. "Oh! That's right! You were wanting us to do CPR, right? You were depending on us to do what we were supposed to bad..."

Yeah, but I'm guessing that will never happen.

Life comes down to two kinds of people: the powerful and the powerless. For a couple of days, I had forgotten that.


Anonymous said...

I take it that you've never watched our local "Lawyers on Call", a PBS weeknight show featuring local lawyers.

I would love to hear your thoughts after an evening critiquing this show!

Debbie said...

OH MY GOD!!! I have seen about ten minutes of this show and STBX's lawyer was on it!

I actually didn't critique it, I dubbed my own comments in everytime he opened his mouth:

"Why, I LOVE representing Kiddy Touchers! It's how I financed my new boat and bought all that fast food that has made me so obese!

And I think every child that has been molested should be forced to keep their molesting father's name because PEDOPHILES ARE GREAT GUYS AND THEY PAY IN CASH! And if they can't afford me, their relatives allow them to cash in on the family owned condo to get the money to FUCK THEIR FAMILY UP!


Oh yeah, after ten minutes I realized it was not helping me out. It was just winding me up and making me bounce off the walls for an hour.

I cannot seperate out what a person will do for money with what a person professes to believe in their heart of hearts. If you defend a pedophile, you are standing up for that person's rights to do what they did. The whole "Everyone deserves a fair trial and justice under the law and I'm just making sure taht happens" is BULLSHIT when you sit on the other side of the fence.

If you stand up with scum, you can't help but get it on you as well. If that is how you choose to live your life, may a thousand poisonous frogs slither up your anus and eat their way out your eye sockets.

Not to get too graphic or anything.

superiorfan said...

The National Institute of Health (NIH) announced last week that they were going to start using defense attorneys instead of rats in their experiments. Naturally, the American Bar Association was outraged and filed suit. Yet, the NIH presented some very good reasons for the switch.

1. The lab assistants were becoming very attached to their little rats. This emotional involvement was interfering with the research being conducted. No such attachment could form for a defense attorney.

2. Defense attorneys breed faster and are in much greater supply.

3. Humanitarian societies won't jump all over you no matter what you're studying.

4. There are some things even a rat won't do.

Anonymous said...

I love your daughter's art.

I just had a Debbie sighting. I was in the wine bar as you were leaving. I thought of inviting you back in for a glass of wine, but I didn't want you to think I was some sort of freak.


Debbie said...

Funny! For a second I couldn't remember being near a wine bar but I went to Chester Creek last night for dinner!

I have no social life so you'd think I'd remember these things...

Annie said...

What is it with lawyers? Why take up a profession requiring accuracy, timeliness and organization if you just plain aren't interested? Money trumps pride? Or self-regard depends only on job title, not job performance?

And a great illustration--congratulations, Marina.